~ Message to Someone far away ~

Hey my Baby Blush! :)

I hope You are fine Sweetheart!

I have my two carry over exams this week and the third one next week,

I am really looking forward to clear my backs this time!

And I just wish this week passes away very soon and I once again get stress-free! :D

Apart from the exam stresses,

I have started hating my college more and more with every passing day 

and these days I prefer to stay at my home instead of going to college!

Somehow that place makes me feel uncomfortable now,

for I see changed attitude of 'Friends' there 

and above all I am not able to hide the hurt I feel 

when I recall some of those statements like,

'My parents didn't send me here to take care of Someone else..'

( The Someone being me.. )

It was bad, real bad!

Those memories just haunt me 

and somehow I feel alone seeing the look of indifference on those faces.

Am I so bad?

Yes! there are few friends who support me in my loneliness 

but I find my thoughts drifting to that day,

the eye-opener day..

I didn't utter a word for I knew I had hurt Someone very very bad,

I was in Pain too but maybe it seemed some melodrama to everyone else.

I know I won't be able to forgive myself ever for that..

And my Heart cried in pain hearing that,

'It was nice meeting You...'

God!

I had never expected that I would ever hear something like this from You but well I did.

People say to me,

'How would You understand the Pain You have caused...'

but very few know

The Pain I have caused is also the Pain I am undergoing.

Every time I think of You,

I hate myself for what I did with You!

How do I tell You I did care for You,

its just that I  couldn't convince my Heart in all those years

and

I just couldn't lie to You anymore.

I know I did wrong

but please trust me I never wanted to play with Your emotions.

It wasn't You, it was me,

it was totally my fault

but

I never ever intended to hurt You,

still don't.

I cared a hell lot for You,

will always do,

although the only thing I can do right now for You is 

pray to God to fill your life with happiness and help You make a new start.

Just one request,

Please stay who You are,

who You were with me,

an amazing human!

Please!

God Bless You!